The Road to 40 Day 32/365: Che trip 2 of X

by | Jun 11, 2025 | Strawberry-Filled Donuts

We saw Che off today as she flew out for work.

For these three months, she will be flying in and out for work for varying lengths of time. The last time she had to be away for as much as three weeks, we still had Ate Jen with us and Vino was still about four or five.

He’s turning eight next month, and while it doesn’t seem like a lot, the difference is quite significant in terms of his development.

Back then, he was always devastated that Che had to leave, and video calls almost made it more difficult because he’d remember that Che was not coming home for a few more days.

This time around, he’s more understanding about the situation.

I remember we had a short conversation where he said he would prefer not to leave SG anymore even if Che found work elsewhere. After all, he was born in SG, and this is what he considers home.

He said he’s fine since I’m here with him, but it’s easier said than actually done. When we took Che to the airport, he was asking when she would be back and said he two days is such a long time to be away from her.

I’m trying to slowly take him through our schedule for the coming months, including where we would be and the days when we won’t be with Che for stretches.

As a househusband, the best way I could support Che is to manage Vino and the house while she’s away. This is a temporary arrangement for three months, but I feel the void in the house when she’s not with us.

It’s difficult for me to imagine how couples manage long-distance relationships brought about by working overseas.

We almost thought about doing it when the logistics for Vietnam were proving to be a pain. But I told Che that where she goes, we go, and considering the stress and challenges she had to go through during her time there, I would say it was well worth all the trouble we had to go through.

Learning from our experience, we decided that if she ever gets relocated again, it has to be for at least two years.

It was difficult seeing Vino struggle in his new environment during the first few weeks we were there, but it was equally rewarding to see him thrive when he got more comfortable. Unfortunately, I had to see him have his heart broken after he learned that he needed to leave his friends behind to go back to SG.

For me, I’m confident enough to make friends and adjust anywhere. I’m happy just to be a sponge for all the pains and sadness that Che and Vino have to experience in their new environments.

But one year is such a whirlwind of a time to do all those. In reality, we spent a year and a half in Vietnam, but it still felt not quite long enough and significantly not short at the same time.

Anyway, these three months are going to be challenging for us, but at least I have the peace of mind that Che can be with family even if she’s not with Vino and me. Meanwhile, Vino is in what he came to know as his home, SG, so at least he has a level of comfort that he may not have anywhere else.

We said goodbye to Che and went home. I folded another mountain of clothes, played a short game with Vino, and went to bed.

Che would land in the PH past Vino’s bedtime, so I let him sleep already.

I felt a little light-headed again while I tried to sleep. I would usually panic when I felt like drowning, but I’m now slowly trying to see how far I would drown.

I don’t know what causes it and how to get over it, but I feel like letting myself fall into the imaginary hole that I feel like falling into is a way of facing it head-on.

Che sent a message that got to her hotel safely, so I just tried to ease my mind a bit more to get some sleep.

Tomorrow will be a new day with just Vino and me doing our daily things, with Che doing her thing in the PH. I’m happy to hear Vino praying for Che to have a safe trip without me having to remind him. It helps me be more at peace knowing that I’m not alone in worrying about Che while she’s not with us. 

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